Monday, November 7, 2016

My Cancer Diagnosis – How My Left Breast is Trying to Kill Me

[Warning: In this post I talk about my boob. A lot. I also curse and talk about medical things, so if you’re squeamish, probably skip this.]

 

About six weeks ago, after experiencing a sharp random pain in my left breast, I found a lump. My first thoughts: HOLY SHIT, I HAVE CANCER. After an hour of online research I calmed down. I’m young and cancer doesn’t usually hurt. It doesn’t make your breast swell to twice the normal size. It doesn’t come on suddenly. Self diagnosis, I convinced myself I had a cyst. They’re common in my family.

 

I went to my doctor who also agreed it was probably a cyst but ordered a mammogram and ultrasound just to be sure. I was still convinced it was a cyst. Up until the moment when the big boss radiologist came into the room and she told me that I had three solid masses in my breast and one in my armpit. My thoughts at that moment? FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK.

 

Back to HOLY SHIT, I HAVE CANCER. Because although I’m not a pessimist, I am a realist. They don’t order a biopsy for no reason. A single mass in my breast may be benign, but three? And one already in my lymh node? Yeah, that has got to be fucking cancer. I called my sister to warn her. She cried. I told her not to cry. She cried some more. My husband and I talked about what to do if it was cancer and decided not to fuck around. To do whatever it took to get better.

 

The next day I had to go back for a biopsy. I needed four total and for each one they covered the spot in iodine, gave me a numbing shot, and shoved a super long needle with nifty vacuum suction action to take samples. Then they put a titanium marker in the spot to show where the sample was taken. (Yeah, was hoping it would make my boob bionic, but sadly, no.)

 

Rinse, repeat. The whole thing took four hours. Then they did another mammogram to make sure the markers were in place. If you don’t know about mammograms, they are not gentle. They took my already punctured, aching breast and placed it in a big machine where it was squished between two glass plates. Then they needed the side view. My poor boob was not happy.

 

Fast forward to Saturday, ten days ago. My doctor calls. I know it must be awesome news because, what doctor doesn’t love to call patients on a Saturday? Well, the cells were malignant and at 35 years of age, HOLY SHIT, I HAVE CANVER.

 

I’m starting chemo next week. I don’t know how I’ll react, so though I’ll probably be around on social media, I might not always respond right away if at all. I’m going to conserve my energy to work on my latest contracted novel.
 
 
So how am I feeling? Angry but hopeful. I have a great cancer team and am otherwise healthy. I have a good chance of coming out of this less one boob, but very much alive. Please share your stories of cancer survival for yourself/friends/and family. I would love to hear them!
 
 
 

34 comments:

  1. I will be praying for you. I'm sorry. My hubby went thru chemo in 2013. He lost one testicle to cancer. Stay positive.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. After being in relationship with Wilson for seven years,he broke up with me, I did everything possible to bring him back but all was in vain, I wanted him back so much because of the love I have for him, I begged him with everything, I made promises but he refused. I explained my problem to someone online and she suggested that I should contact a spell caster that could help me cast a spell to bring him back but I am the type that don't believed in spell, I had no choice than to try it, I meant a spell caster called Dr AKHERE and I email him, and he told me there was no problem that everything will be okay before three days, that my ex will return to me before three days, he cast the spell and surprisingly in the second day, it was around 4pm. My ex called me, I was so surprised, I answered the call and all he said was that he was so sorry for everything that happened, that he wanted me to return to him, that he loves me so much. I was so happy and went to him, that was how we started living together happily again. Since then, I have made promise that anybody I know that have a relationship problem, I would be of help to such person by referring him or her to the only real and powerful spell caster who helped me with my own problem and who is different from all the fake ones out there. Anybody could need the help of the spell caster, his email: AKHERETEMPLE@gmail.com
      or
      call/whatsapp:+2349057261346 you can email him if you need his assistance in your relationship or anything. CONTACT HIM NOW FOR SOLUTION TO ALL YOUR PROBLEMS
      AKHERETEMPLE@gmail.com
      or
      call/whatsapp:+2349057261346

      Delete
    2. Five weeks ago my boyfriend broke up with me. It all started when i went to summer camp i was trying to contact him but it was not going through. So when I came back from camp I saw him with a young lady kissing in his bed room, I was frustrated and it gave me a sleepless night. I thought he will come back to apologies but he didn't come for almost three week i was really hurt but i thank Dr.Azuka for all he did i met Dr.Azuka during my search at the internet i decided to contact him on his email dr.azukasolutionhome@gmail.com he brought my boyfriend back to me just within 48 hours i am really happy. 

      Delete
  2. My father survived about the worst kind of skin cancer you can get, going on twenty five years now. Good that you've got good medical teams working on you.

    ReplyDelete
  3. You are stronger than this Mimi.Wishing you the best and praying.

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  4. Sending you lots of healing energy and strength. <3 <3 <3

    ReplyDelete
  5. You are fierce and wonderful and I hate that this incredibly shitty thing is happening to you. You're going to win. I believe that through and through. The question is, how can we help you fight? What would make this a little less awful? Food? Gift cards to Amazon or iTunes for binge watching? I know I'm not the only one out here who thinks you're amazing. 💗 I'm in your corner all the way.

    ReplyDelete
  6. I will send good mojo and prayers. My husband almost 2 years ago went to the nose doctor to get his sinuses fixed. A routine CT scan showed a brain tumor. It was a wham bam thank you mam experience. Boom, brain tumor to boom brain surgery. The tumor was the size of a golf ball. Thank goodness it was benign. Then, six months after removal the seizures started. He has had 5 seizures. We are trying to get those under control now. I applaud that you are being strong I'm this. But, please do not hold everything or even a little bit in. Find a support group or a dear friend who will talk with you. You have your family, friends and fans who will keep you in their thoughts as you kick cancer's ass!! #fuckcancer

    ReplyDelete
  7. Shit, Demitria.This sucks so much. I'm so sorry you have to go through this horrible horrible thing. I'll think good thoughts for you.

    ReplyDelete
  8. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  9. *hugs*

    You got this girl. There's good news in this. You have a cancer that is treatable. You can fight this! Who needs two boobs anyway? Seriously though, I'm keeping you in my thoughts. You are an amazing person and an amazing writer. I hope you make it through this. I believe in you. I lost my mom to terminal brain cancer back in March. We never saw it coming. She was diagnosed in February, and gone in March. Just like that. Only 49 years old.. You can fight this. You have a chance. You totally got this girl! Please keep us updated!

    ReplyDelete
  10. I am also disappointed that your boob is not bionic now... although I'm not exactly sure what good a bionic boob would do for you.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Grandmother has survived a double mastectomy, mom is on year 5 of surviving hers (she was entertained by her radiation "tattoos") and I believe there's a slew of cervical cancer survivors in addition to breast cancer throughout. I had a cancerous mole removed, luckily it was benign. Dad is currently treating precancerous lesions and old roomie has survived melanoma. High school friend survived ovarian cancer (asymptomatic at 22) and is a wonderful foster mom since kids are out of the question (which was her dream). Luckily we live in a world with great medicine, lots of cancer research and it's not the death sentence it used to be. There are a ton of survivors, great support groups and all sorts of things you can do (fun fact, my mom gets free yoga for life as part of the research group she opted into as part of her treatment). Best advise: decide what *you* want to do and find the (medical/spiritual/support) team that fits.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Mimic, I don't know if you knew I'm a 24 yr survivor of Hodgkins Lymphoma. Different than breast cancer, but I went thru chemo and radiation and bone marrow biopsy, lymphangiogram, etc. You just have to have a strong will to fight it, and keep looking to the next goal till they say "cancer free". Which they will. Eat to keep up your strength. Don't worry about losing a boob, that can be fixed too. I'm wishing you all the strength and power you'll need. Love you!! Robin Landers

    ReplyDelete
  13. I know so many women who can safely and confidently speak about that time back when they had breast cancer. Cured. Over. A thing of the past. They seem to get tattoos to celebrate. Be strong and optimistic, as I know you will. love from Liz

    ReplyDelete
  14. Demitria, storming the heavens for you and sending you strength to beat this down. I am disappointed that your boob is not bionic though. It seems like you deserve that after all of this. (((((Hugs)))))

    ReplyDelete
  15. It's good to see you're already being strong and positive - you're going to beat this cancer bullshit to the curb, boob or no boob! We'll all be cheering you on through the process. Like you said, just focus all your energy on writing, and of course, beating the hell out of this cancer. *hugs*

    ReplyDelete
  16. some have been even known to purpose infection or even dying in a money-crazed world. but, with an awful lot scientific research as well as having the ok with the aid of many docs the newest supplements have come a protracted way. There are dietary supplements available on the market that have been extraordinarily a success. For more ==== >>>>>> http://musclegainfast.com/ion-z/

    ReplyDelete
  17. So sorry you have to deal with this ordeal...but good you have so many caring people. I am with the other Liz... know so many people for whom breast cancer is ancient history. My best friend - 10cm invasive lobular and in nodes. Years ago!

    ReplyDelete
  18. Pray, pray, pray...
    and it wont happen, dear.
    I'll even pray for you.
    Lemme giveth thee summore
    Words from Jesus to help...

    The more you shall honor Me,
    the more I shall bless you.
    -the Infant Jesus of Prague
    (<- Czech Republic, next to Russia)

    trustNjesus ALWAYS, dear,
    and wiseabove to Seventh-Heaven...
    cuzz the only other realm aint too cool.
    God bless your indelible soul.

    ReplyDelete
  19. Pray, pray, pray...
    and it wont happen, dear.
    I'll even pray for you.
    Lemme giveth thee summore
    Words from Jesus to help...

    The more you shall honor Me,
    the more I shall bless you.
    -the Infant Jesus of Prague
    (<- Czech Republic, next to Russia)

    trustNjesus ALWAYS, dear,
    and wiseabove to Seventh-Heaven...
    cuzz the only other realm aint too cool.
    God bless your indelible soul.

    ReplyDelete
  20. WHAT A GREAT MIRACLE THAT I HAVE EVER SEE IN MY LIFE. My names are MONICA HARRY I’m a citizen of United Kingdom, My younger sister was sick of breast cancer and her name is SHELLY HARRY I and my family have taking her to all kind of hospital in UK still yet no good result. I decided to go to the internet and search for cancer cure so that was how I find a lady called peter Lizzy she was testifies to the world about the goodness of a herbal man who has the root and half to cure all kind of disease and the herbal man email was there. So I decided to contact the herbal man for my younger sister help to cure her breast cancer. I contacted him and told him my problem he told me that I should not worry that my sister cancer will be cure, he told me that there is a medicine that he is going to give me that I will cook and prepared it and give it to my sister to drink for one week, so I ask how can I receive the cure that I am in UK, he told me that I will pay for the delivery service. The courier service can transport it to me so he told me the amount I will pay, so my dad paid for the delivery fee. two days later I receive the cure from the courier service so I used it as the herbal man instructed me to, before the week complete my sister cancer was healed and it was like a dream to me not knowing that it was physical I and my family were very happy about the miracle of Doctor so my dad wanted to pay him 5 million us dollars the herbal man did not accept the offer from my dad, but I don't know why he didn't accept the offer, he only say that I should tell the world about him and his miracle he perform so am now here to tell the world about him if you or your relative is having any kind of disease that you can't get cure from the hospital please contact drosedebamenherbalhome@gmail.com you can call him +2347036842735 or whatsApp him +2347036842735 for the cure, he will help you out with the problem.

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    ReplyDelete
  21. I was in trouble when doctor told me that I have been diagnosed with Herpes disease… I thought about my Family, I know my Family will face a serious problem when I'm gone, I lost hope and I wept all day, but one day I was searching the internet I found Dr.ezomo contact number. I called him and he guided me. I asked him for solutions and he started the remedies for my health. Thank God, now everything is fine, I'm cured by Dr.ezomo herbal medicine, I'm very thankful to Dr.ezomo and very happy with my hubby and family. email him on dr.ezomorootandherbals@gmail.com or you can also reach him through WhatsApp number+2349069171173
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    ReplyDelete
  22. My name is Gloria from Senegal, I came in here to confirm Hepatitis B. testimony that I red online some moths ago. I red about how Dr. Iyabiye cured one Mr. Henry and I decided to give it a try to see if my sister could be healed or cured too, behold my sister got cured after she applied his medication for a month. I am here to thank Dr. Iyabiye and to encourage people and reach him for help through: iyabiyehealinghome@gmail.com Call/Whatsapp: +2348072229413

    ReplyDelete
  23. After being in relationship with Wilson for seven years,he broke up with me, I did everything possible to bring him back but all was in vain, I wanted him back so much because of the love I have for him, I begged him with everything, I made promises but he refused. I explained my problem to someone online and she suggested that I should contact a spell caster that could help me cast a spell to bring him back but I am the type that don't believed in spell, I had no choice than to try it, I meant a spell caster called Dr AKHERE and I email him, and he told me there was no problem that everything will be okay before three days, that my ex will return to me before three days, he cast the spell and surprisingly in the second day, it was around 4pm. My ex called me, I was so surprised, I answered the call and all he said was that he was so sorry for everything that happened, that he wanted me to return to him, that he loves me so much. I was so happy and went to him, that was how we started living together happily again. Since then, I have made promise that anybody I know that have a relationship problem, I would be of help to such person by referring him or her to the only real and powerful spell caster who helped me with my own problem and who is different from all the fake ones out there. Anybody could need the help of the spell caster, his email: AKHERETEMPLE@gmail.com
    or
    call/whatsapp:+2349057261346 you can email him if you need his assistance in your relationship or anything. CONTACT HIM NOW FOR SOLUTION TO ALL YOUR PROBLEMS
    AKHERETEMPLE@gmail.com
    or
    call/whatsapp:+2349057261346

    ReplyDelete
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    ReplyDelete
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    ReplyDelete
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    ReplyDelete